I still want to eat like a kid

Eating like a kid is a problem, because I don’t have a kid’s body, a kid’s metabolism, or a kid’s energy level any more.  I’m an adult woman, with a sometimes aching body who struggle to eat right.

This morning a friend shared with me her efforts to change her eating habits.  She only half jokingly said that those efforts were giving her a migraine.  That comment made me think about how difficult it is to quit old habits and develop new ones when it comes to eating.  And if, like me, you were never taught how to eat as a kid, making those changes is even harder.  You’re now on your own to define for yourself what good eating habits are and should look like.

Some days I feel like my childhood was stunted.

I don’t mean to say that its all my “mommy’s” fault that I overeat.  It’s my choice to eat what I eat and eat it for the reasons I eat it.  I’ve ceased blaming others for that–its a loser’s game.  Instead, I own the fact that I’m a big girl with big girl choices to make in this world, and I’m learning to make them as best I can. What I’m trying to say here is that it isn’t always easy, but change is possible.  For thinking, rational, reasonable adults, it is.

My childhood has left me struggling to catch up in some ways…

With regards to discipline.

And balance.

And accepting my shortcomings.

And forging new pathways.

And facing my fears.

But I digress.

What my friend was trying to say this morning is that change is hard–migraine inducing hard sometimes. I agree, but I also know that we are all stronger than we think we are!!!  I first learned that at the gym. We also have a Helper we can call on whenever we need extra assistance.  Your Helper might be different from my Helper, but if you’ve been trying to get healthy for any length of time you know that HELP is EVERYWHERE.  You just have to want it and be willing to accept it.

As I have become willing to accept the help offered to me, I’ve seen some encouraging things take shape in my life.

I’ve seen…

Patterns emerge that help me to better know myself.

I’ve seen…

A Game Plan develop.

I’ve seen…

Real commitment on my part to follow a plan.

And I’ve seen…

A sense of empowerment come from stating a goal, working to reach that goal, and achieving that goal.

Goals Rock, especially when they are achieved.

I’m getting stronger!!!

Finally, I’ve seen…

Relationships between me and others that were once strained find healing.

Because of all this change–change that never would have happened had I not wanted to get better–I have come out on the other side of sickness stronger, more confident, and better prepared to deal with the future.  I’m ready to move forward with new tools and put new strategies in place, understanding myself and others in a way I never could have if my thinking and acting (and eating), were still reflecting that childish willfulness that used to be the hallmark of my personality.

I’m excited for the future.

I’m wearing a size pant that I have not been in since high school, and feeling pretty good about that.

When others make a comment on the changes they see in me, I respond with, “Find a plan you can stick with for the rest of your life, then keep pushing, keep leaning into God, keep believing in the process, and keep trusting yourself. Oh, and take a few aspirin for the pain.  Cuz ‘life is pain, highness.  Anyone who says differently is trying to sell something.'”

Gotta love that Princess Bride.  😉

Do you still want to eat like a kid sometimes?  How have your habits changed over the years? What is the most adult thing you do when interacting with food these days?